Little Debbie Stole Christmas

I was determined not to miss the Little Debbie Christmas treats. I missed some of the fall ones and I wasn't going to let that happen again, so this season I think I got 'em all. And I am sorely disappointed.


Let's start with gingerbread - a holiday tradition and a personal favorite of mine:








They look festive enough, they were the perfect degree of softness, but - alas, they were just not good. I ADORE gingerbread but these seem to have some kind of weird aftertaste. Not sure what was happening here, but it was not good. Archway makes a MUCH better gingerbread cookie. I'd post pictures of the Archway ones, but I already ate them all.



These looked good:






Creative, right? Love the red and green. Again, not good - nothing bad, just kind of tasteless. I have a box of regular Rice Krispy Treats and they are WAY better. Something is missing here. ZZZZZ.



Okay, there's still hope! There's chocolate!!!

Okay, maybe the sprinkles need a little help, but these look good! And they were definitely the best of the bunch, but for 190 calories each, not amazing. Only average. I'd rather have one of Little D's pumpkin cookie things or her peanut butter bars. Or even an oatmeal cream pie! Sad, but true.

Okay wait, what about these?

Okay, artistically they don't really look like the trees on the box. Taste-wise...well, they are just kind of flat. They aren't bad brownies, they just aren't really good brownies. They have a great consistency, but again, the flavor is just, well - average. Again, not really worth the calories. Disappointing. : (

And finally:

Something clearly happens to the sprinkles between posing for the shot on the box and getting to the consumer, but hey, what the heck. I had high hopes for these too. I like frosted cookies like these - I know they are cheap, but I've always liked 'em. These? Not so much. Again - a weird aftertaste. A blah factor. So heartbreaking.

Now here's a shocker:

Okay - another sprinkle mutiny, but look at that radioactive green! I LOVE it! I was surprised by the shameless printing of their name on every cookie, but whatever. There are like 10 billion cookies in here and they were cheap as dirt. I got them at Target. I bought them for the name - Festive - and the outrageous color. And as cheap and cheesy as they are - they are the best of the lot!

Oh Little Debbie, why have you forsaken me? Was it what I said about Martha?

The lesson? We always want what we can't have. I really, really wanted the Fall Little Debbie brownies. When they were sold out, I was sure they would be the best thing EVAH! But now that I have the Christmas ones - well......

Here's the eternal challenge of the human race - continue to strive and grow vs. being happy with what you have. The secret is to find the mix that works for YOU. What works for your friend on the corporate fast track may not work for you. You might choose more time with family or more time to travel and less income.

So this holiday season, be very thankful for all you have and remember that what you don't have may not be as great as it seems. And if you do get it, it may not have nearly as many sprinkles on it as you thought.

A Holiday Motivational Tale

It's interesting how your priorities and what you're grateful for can shift so suddenly.

One of the things you have to do after major surgery these days is get injections of Lovenox to prevent blood clots. (Nice topic, I know, but bear with me.) They send you home from the hospital with a box of ten which you have to give yourself in the stomach. Oh yeah - it sucks. They burn, you can't find a new place to stick one, and while I have plenty of meat on my other bones, I am really lean in my midsection which makes it even worse. I dreaded these damn things. I was so thrilled when I finished the box! Woohoo!

Things that seemed so important before the surgery (finding someone to date, getting more speaking engagements, etc.) are not so important now. Now all I want is to recover, to get back to where I was. To be able to do my five mile walk and drive my car.

What does this have to do with you?

Ah-ha! I am going to be the Ghost of Christmas past for you. Think of your past - what decisions did you make about your health (or relationships or finances or work - you can pick your problem area) that impacted your present? I'm going to use health for this example. Let's visit the past.

There you are standing at the holiday party drinking like a fish with one hand and eating like a mad person with the other. The next day it's cold and you have a hangover so you don't workout. It's cold for the next three months, so you quit working out entirely. You keep eating and drinking a lot because it's the holidays - Christmas, New Year's, Valentine's Day, St. Patty's Day, Easter, your birthday...... (Remember insert any problem behavior - you keep spending because there are such good after Christmas sales, the new styles are coming out, you have to have it, etc. etc.)

Now we have the Ghost of Christmas Present. All your bad health decisions have caught up to you. You can't enjoy playing with the grandkids because you get winded after about three seconds. You don't feel like decorating because your back and knees hurt so much. After all, you haven't stretched in the past ten years. You don't want to go to any holiday parties because none of your clothes fit anymore. (Finances - you can't buy any presents because your credit cards are maxed out. You can't have the family over to your house for Christmas because you can't afford to. You can't buy a ticket to go see them for the same reason. You are celebrating without them. Maybe you have so much clutter you are embarrassed to invite anyone over.)

Ah - the horrifying Ghost of Christmas to Come. You are in the hospital and your family is in the waiting room. The Doctor comes out to talk with them. He says, "Things would have gone much better if your mother had been a little healthier. The high cholesterol, the diabetes, her lack of any type of physical activity made the procedure much more difficult. She's going to have a very long and painful recovery. I hope you all are up to it." You are in terrible pain and are now a burden on your family. Because you weren't exercising before you don't want to start now (it's a heck of a lot harder when you're in pain). You are dependent and crabby. Family visits less and less.

Play out your area of weakness - want to lose your home? Keep living beyond your means. Want your relationships to go south? Keep putting your family and friends last.

I'm not trying to depress you - I'm trying to wake you up!!! Everyday since the surgery I am so grateful I put in all those hours of exercise. I can tell how difficult this recovery would be for someone in poor health. Look at the recession - it hammered so many people because they had been living beyond their means for years. What do you want your Christmas to Come to be? Do you want to feel great? Do you want to be surrounded by friends and family? Do you want to head out to the tropics? Start making the changes that will have those results IMMEDIATELY. The future is a result of the actions we take today, and little actions today have a huge impact over time.

Guess that won't fit on the inside of a Dove wrapper. Martha's safe.

The Grand Chocolate Peppermint Finale!!

Why? Why, oh why do I keep giving Russell Stover a chance? It's just like my continued return to Match.com - clear insanity. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Forget crutches, I should be sporting a straight jacket.


Here's RS's entry in the battle for peppermint prowess:

Unlike the usual RS filled blob, we can actually see that this is, indeed, a snowman. He is apparently hanging onto this scarf for dear life, but nonetheless, we can tell what he is. We can even see the carrot for his nose. The point of view is wrong, no snowman's nose is a sideways carrot, but still extraordinary for RS. He is made of white chocolate with peppermint chips and a dark chocolate base. The peppermint is in there, although not nearly as visible as in other offerings. And I have to say, I prefer the dark chocolate here to the milk chocolate of Ghirardelli. I know, shocking, right? But before things get crazy, the Ghirardelli chocolate is so much smoother and creamier than the RS chocolate, they still come out ahead.

But there's another entry in this peppermint pecking order:

Our friends at Dove! I have to say this may be the ugliest holiday candy bag ever - mostly grey and with the Martha Stewart stamp in blue. Ugly. It does get better, however:

LOVE the red and green polka dots!!

Now these have the right combo - dark chocolate (I think dark works best here because it offsets the sweetness of the white.) I also like the balance of the three flavors - here dark chocolate comes out on top, you taste it the most. Peppermint lovers may prefer Ghirardelli as would milk chocolate lovers. And the Ghirardelli squares are really hard not to like. But I just think the dark chocolate works best.

The only drawback to the Dove Promises is the horrible Martha Stewart "tips" on the inside. I much, much, much prefer the old cool holiday messages - things like "Let joy find you this holiday season" or "Linger under the mistletoe." Instead we get:

That says "Out of wrapping paper? Use an old map or a sewing pattern."

Yeah - I don't have any wrapping paper, but I have tons of sewing patterns (like that would look good) and maps. Martha does have a computer, right? Who has maps anymore? Maybe she owns stock in Rand McNally.

Other great tips from the wise one:

"Individually wrap ornaments in acid-free tissue for storage."

Need some more stress? Start worrying if you're wrapping the ornaments in the right paper.

Or how about this gem of genius:

"Make a plan for clearing and cleaning holiday dishes."

A plan? Are you kidding me? You need a plan to storm the beach at Normandy, not to clear the dinner table. How has anyone survived the holidays without Martha's wisdom? A better question is "How much did Mars pay her for this BS?" I would write cool inserts just for free chocolate. And they would be WAY better than Martha's. And I'm not a convicted felon.

Now this snowman kicks RS's snowman's behiney:

Wow! Even his nose is in the right place!

I found him with this gorgeous tree in Walgreen's:

These are made by Riviera Brands out of Deerfield, Illinois under the Hazelwood Gourmet label. The wrapper says they are made with Belgian chocolate. I don't know about that.

However, the snowman is way better than I expected. The peppermint is chewy rather than crunchy and the milk chocolate base is thick enough to offset the sweetness. I am shocked! The snowman is really good looking AND tastes good! What a great office gift or stocking stuffer. Well done! Hell, even unknown brands kick RS's butt.

The Christmas Tree is also not bad. It's pretty much just chocolate, but it really is festive. I think these are better than those chocolate lollipops Godiva did for Halloween. A+++ in design and B for flavor. And, if I know Walgreen's they'll probably run a sale on them soon if they haven't already. Grab some for emergency gifts. Hell - they look good enough to hang on your tree! (See - I got better ideas than Martha! Acid-free tissue - puleeze!)

Speaking of my arch enemy - Godiva - here's something I found in Belk but did not see in the Godiva boutique:

Could there be a cheesier inner wrapper? Even Hershey and Mars do better than this!

But I do like the look if the candy itself. I like the red and white chips. Here's the Godiva description:

Deliciously creamy Godiva white chocolate, mixed with cool, crunchy candy cane pieces, enrobed in Godiva dark chocolate and topped with candy bits.

Here's my description:

Some okay white chocolate with some crunched up peppermint dipped in some okay dark chocolate with some random sprinkle like things.

There ain't no "creamy" anywhere. I swear I just don't think Godiva's chocolate is that outstanding. These aren't bad, but they aren't great by any means. I think something much better is:

Now this is my kind of assortment!!! The boring chocolate Santas are the smallest quantity and the Reese's Trees are the largest! And that Martha bitch is nowhere in sight!

We'll talk trees and Santas in another post. Our present priority is peppermint:

You want creamy? This is creamy! Love the special holiday shape! Like the sparkly snowflake wrapper. (Godiva, get out of the candy ghetto with that cheap wrapper! And don't try to use old maps either.)

Peppermint Patties are an oldie but a goodie. Way cheaper than Godiva, but, to be honest, I like them better! Now, again, they can't beat the creamy Lindor truffle, but these are good.

I have to conclude with what might just be my favorite peppermint confection of the season - Harry and David's Peppermint Maltballs:

They look totally festive - Put then in a clear glass container and - bam - instant holiday cheer! (Take that, Martha!). And they taste great! The crunchy maltball and the dark chocolate all make for a great combo. Very creative use of textures and flavors and I like they way they look.

Let me conclude with a tip for Martha:

"Wrap little white lights around the bars of your cell, it is both festive and elegant."

And for Santa:

"Even if someone is chasing you with a golf club, keep your eyes toward the front of the sleigh at all times."

Two Blonde Brownies Recipes

Blonde Brownies Recipe (Blondies)

1 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/8 teaspoon salt
6 tbsp. butter
3/4 cup light brown sugar
1 egg
1 tbsp. milk
1 teaspoon vanilla
10 oz. chocolate chunks or chips
1/2 c nuts, chopped (optional)

Mix flour, soda, and salt, set aside.

Cream butter, sugar, brown sugar, and vanilla. Add flour mix and beat until creamy. Add chocolate chips and nuts if desired.

Bake in 9x9-inch pan at 350 degrees F for 20-25 minutes.

Chocolate Chip Blonde Brownies

2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup chopped nuts
2/3 cup butter
2 cups packed brown sugar
2 eggs, slightly beaten
2 teaspoon vanilla
6 oz. semisweet chocolate chips

Sift together flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Add nuts; mix well and set aside.

Melt butter in saucepan; remove from heat. Add brown sugar; beat well. Let cool.

Add eggs and vanilla. Blend well. Add flour mixture, a small amount at a time, mixing well after each addition.

Spread in greased 9x12-inch baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees F for 20 to 25 minutes. Cool in pan and cut in squares.

Godiva, Schmiva

Yesterday I walked a mile! Oh yeah, baby!! Today I decided I could venture out into the world. St. Tracy carted me to run some errands, and you know I had to secure some chocolate! The Godiva Holiday stars weren't out when I went into the hospital and I didn't want to miss them like I missed some of their Halloween pieces. Am I dedicated to chocolate or what? I do it all for you, dear readers! ; )

But first, let me show you what I found in the grocery store by the Christmas candy:

Andes is at it again! Now it doesn't say these are new or are for Christmas, but I've never seen them before. Let me tell you, these put the mint Girl Scout Cookies to shame!

Like the green layer! These are really, really good. These would be great as a stocking stuffer, an office gifts - less formal than the original Andes mints - and guaranteed to be a hit. Would be fab crumpled over ice cream or dunked in milk. A+++

Now let's check out the outrageously priced Godiva offerings:

Definitely gorgeous - love, love, love the way they look. At $2.25 each, however, they ain't cheap. They are about the size of a 50 cent piece.

The red one is Aztec Hot Chocolate - a chocolate ganache with a hint of habanaro oil in dark chocolate:

There's a very slight hint of habanaro. I think a hint of cinnamon too would have made this better. The ganache is smooth and creamy, but it needs a little more ole'.

Green is Twilight Mint - chocolate mint ganache in dark chocolate:

A nice, sophisticated mint taste - like a real mint sprig. But as I said in the last post, mint doesn't rock my world, so this is only okay to me. Pretty though, very pretty.

Gold is Holiday Spice - chocolate ganache with cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg and ginger in milk chocolate. Sounds awesome!!!

Hmmm......apparently my eyes see the world differently than the eyes of the Godiva people. That sure don't look like chocolate ganache to me! This is an interesting flavor - I think it would have been better if that were chocolate ganache. It's really sweet and the spices are there, but they need to be stronger or this mystery ganache needs to be a little less cloying.

And the one I have the highest hopes for - Almond Shortbread - almond shortbread cookies combined with creamy ganache in dark chocolate:

Okay - WTF? Dark chocolate? I don't think so! Godiva must have changed these after they printed their Chocolate Menu. The closest thing these taste like is sugar cookie dough. I don't taste almond at all. And there is kind of a slight aftertaste. Boo! What a let down!

For the price - remember $2.25 each - these are not worth it. Unless you have money to burn and want to use them to impress people. They do look pretty cool and I would be impressed if someone gave them to me and I didn't have to pay the $2.25! Or if they were on my plate after dinner. Maybe if I crash an event at the White House...

Let's see if their holiday truffles are any better:

Peppermint is already sold out at the shop we stopped by. What do I think? Toothpastey - needs some milk chocolate. And maybe some peppermint crumbles. Ghirardelli kicks Godiva's behiney on this one. I don't have a picture of a Lindt truffle, but Lindt does too. They have a dark chocolate Lindor truffle filled with creamy peppermint and it is AMAZING! Godiva is starting to become my high end Russell Stover. If I only had a golf club....

Next is Egg Nog:

I dunno - ZZZZZZZ. This was boring to me. I don't really think egg nog is the greatest thing ever, so maybe if you love eggnog, you'll love this. I'd rather have a Reese's Tree.

Now I'm excited about the gingerbread truffle - I love gingerbread!

This was my favorite of the truffles. It was very good, but I'd rather have gingerbread. But it was a great attempt and I would recommend it. I wouldn't go to the mall with a recently replaced hip for it, but if you are in the mall anyway, really like ginger bread, and are craving a bit of chocolate - get it, baby!!

Woohoo! Are you getting in the holiday spirit? I sure am this year! St. Tracy insisted I have a Christmas tree and went out and got one and decorated it for me. I love sitting here with my sparkly tree. I'm so grateful the surgery went so well, and I'm so lucky I have friends who were there for me. What are you grateful for this year? What fun can you have? What new things will you try and what old traditions will you share? If I have one wish for you it is that you not be too hard on yourself - you don't try to be perfect or do too much - that you take time to feel the joy and the fun. And to eat some chocolate!!

Creativity, Peppermint and Chocolate

I really am not a big peppermint person. I like it and all, I'm not opposed to peppermint, but it doesn't rock my world. I like mint chocolate chip ice cream, I like those mint girl scout cookies, I'm not inhuman. But well, let's just say it's not peanut butter. It's not caramel either. It's above orange, but below almond. Neck and neck with raspberry. Kicks butt on lemon. That's my peppermint placement. Just so you know where I stand.

But what better flavor to kick off the Christmas postings? It's tradition! It's festive! It's decorative! And it's everywhere!

Real Simple Magazine made some great candy wreaths I want to share with you:

A little too weddingish for me, but very creative (and easy to make - the mag gives full instructions).

I'm glad someone finally found a use for those God-awful Goetze's caramel creams (glaack!).

And, my fav:

Very cool and contemporary. Like I said, full instructions are in the mag. I don't want to infringe on the copyright laws any further than I already have. If this posting disappears, you know I got busted.

Now I won't be making any of these wreaths - I am so NOT a hand crafter. A buyer, an admirer, but that's it. They did get me in search of Andes mints, however, and this is what I found:

LOVE the seasonal designs and the colorful wrappers. Although green was in short supply in this bag. However, the shapes don't seem to correspond to the color, so they might have been more evenly mixed. I have no plan to open them all to find out.

These are just like the standard Andes mint - always a solid, if not earth shattering, choice. BUT because of the extra chocolate used to form the Christmas designs, they are better! Stuff those stockings, Santa!

But Andes didn't stop there! Check these out:

Ah- ha! Very different!!! You all know how I like creativity for the holidays. Don't just be giving us the same old candy in some kind of festive wrapper. Show us something! Bring it!

These, unfortunately, remind me why I don't like peppermint. There's a fine line between tasting like candy and tasting like medicine. These cross over. I don't like 'em. Creative, yes. Good, no.

For comparison, here's Ghirardelli:

Another assortment - with Eggnog (apparently the least popular) and Pecan Pie. We'll review those another time. Peppermint is the star of this show.

Ghirardelli did very, very well. There was the crunch of peppermint, but it was prevented from becoming too strong by better white chocolate and a milk chocolate backing. So far, these are the clear winner in the festive peppermint category. But we are just getting started, dear readers! It is early in the game!

I had great hopes for these:

Don't they look awesome????

Here they are in real life:

They look a little different, huh? Those damn glamour shots!! Kind of like online dating pics.

But the important thing is the taste and I was pretty excited! I like the colors - the sprinkles! But the taste - GLAACK! Yucko! These have a weird aftertaste. What a let down! Skip these and buy peanut butter Oreos again. Why mess with genius? Roll the edges in red sprinkles if you want. But don't get these.

Creativity is good, but at the end of the day - it's about the flavor. Just like with people - a hot exterior is great, but who will be there when you need a new hip? Know what really matters and don't get distracted - it's too easy.

Shock and Awe!

I finally got the reaction I was hoping for. My physical therapist came by today (the first visit Saturday was just an assessment - this was the first meeting with my real therapist). Geez - I didn't realize until now that I'm in therapy. Guess it's about time. Anyway, I digress.

I went to the door and when I opened it, her eyes got wide. She said, "No crutches?" I just grinned and did the double fist pump. Same thing I did four days after surgery while taunting my poor destroyed mailman. She headed off toward my office on the first floor (my townhouse is three stories) and I said - I think it's easier if we do this upstairs and I took off (a relative term, but in this case, it's fast for a woman with a new hip.) As I climbed up, her mouth fell open. She said, "I've worked with Dr. Kelley's patients before, but I've never seen anything like this." Woohoo - score one for the home team!

So after a few questions, she basically said I've already mastered everything they can do for me and did I want to go outside and walk? Oh yeah!!! We took off and walked up the sloping hill next to my house - I dunno - maybe two or three city blocks? And came back. And the best part? The whole time the physical therapist was asking me how to get in such good shape. She even joked about it! She said, "I'm supposed to be helping you and you're motivating me to get back in shape!"

How cool is that? My goal was to get back to work on January 19th. Now my goal is to get back to walking 5 miles 5 times a week by January 19th. Hip replacement? What hip replacement?

Okay, time for some lessons:

1.) Listen to all the advice, but realize that everyone is different. If I had listened to some people (and these were hospital employees!), I would have hired home nursing care and converted my first floor office into a bedroom. As it was, I spent $200 on a pair of crutches I don't even need. The Internet has great information, but at the end of the day, we are all different and we make our own destiny. Be smart, but don't let them scare you.

2.) Luck is a mighty fine thing. I was lucky to find Dr. Kelley (my surgeon). I asked my super fit friend who recovered quickly from knee surgery for her physical therapist's name. When I saw him, he referred me to Dr. Kelley. Dr. K is the only one in the Raleigh area doing the surgery this way. Learning from those who have had amazing results is a mighty smart thing. How can you apply this lesson?

3.) Always be in training. I worked out a lot - the total investment of time was over ten hours a week for many, many years. When my weight was getting a little scary, I started counting calories. And you all know from this blog I LOVE to eat! This is what's making me a superhuman right now. (I mean let's be honest - they sawed my hip bone in half! This was a major deal! Most of my counterparts are still on bed rest. My postman's wife had to take two weeks off work to care for him.) And my incision is small - 4 inches vs. 10 or more because I'm relatively thin. THANK GOD! Who knew?

Why is this important? What if something happens to you? What if you are in a car accident? How well are you going to recover? It's not like you can say, "Hey - don't sew me up - give me a few weeks to lose 20 lbs." This is why some people/businesses got slammed by the recession - they weren't in financial training. They let their debt (fat) get way out of control. And when the wreck occurred, they couldn't even drag themselves off the highway.

Is there some area in your life you might need to get into training now?

4.) Bring your optimism and your determination. There were some scary moments in this process, but I never thought I wouldn't get through it. Even when something bad would happen, I would tell my Sorbet Sistahs, "This is gonna be a good story!" (My customer service training now has some great new material.) I did everything my caregivers told me to do and always tried to push it a little farther - one less pain pill, one more set of exercises. At the end of the day, my recovery will be what I make it.

5.) Be grateful for your friends. Tracy and Beth (my Sorbet Sistahs) came by everyday. Tracy spent her week off sitting in the hospital or at my house with me. It just doesn't get any kinder than that. She made me laugh when I wanted to cry and let me know I wasn't alone. What kinder act could there be?

Also my friend David smuggled in a bag full of every type of Reese's Cup he could get his hands on. Kristina brought Lindt and had her friends who worked at the hospital check in on me. And Pete brought flowers and Ghirardelli. How could I NOT recover with buddies like these?

I've had to ask for help with everything from taking out my garbage (thanks, Chris!) to washing my underwear (Tracy - you are a saint in the Church of Chocolate). And my friends never even hesitated. Why have I wasted so much time trying to find someone to love me, when I had all this love all the time? (And let's face it, those jerks I've dated wouldn't have hung around for any of this.)

And then there were all of you! Just the fact that you check in to read this crazy thing is a huge gift. And those of you who sent me a note or called - that stuff is huge!! I never truly realized how much those little acts of kindness meant until now. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

We're starting the Christmas chocolate tomorrow!!