Friday, August 21, 2009

Life, Death and Chocolate

Ah my beloved readers!! I have missed you! I was on a run to Georgia and didn't do much blogging on the road. But you were on my mind! One thing I noticed as I scoured convenience stores looking for new and exciting chocolate is that Hershey is doing some serious butt kicking! Mars is really taking a beating. I saw a TON of Reese's offerings packing the best shelves! Look for yourself next time you're in - you'll see a sea of yellow and orange wrappers. Talk about line extension! (I'm going to review many of these in the next few postings.)

Also Hershey's new nostalgic wrappers, which I first noticed in Cracker Barrel are getting them extra shelf space! Stores are displaying the regularly wrapped Hershey bar as well as the old timey wrapped version. Very tricky!! (Somebody must be watching Mad Men.)


I'm also seeing some extra large bars and cups that are shocking in their proportions:





Don't get me wrong - I LOVE the big cup! But does anyone really need two? That's 410 calories and 26 grams of fat. But at least you'll die happy!!! Woohoo!!

And speaking of dying (thanks, my brother, Russ for this update!):


PARIS (AFP) – Heart attack survivors who eat chocolate two or more times per week cut their risk of dying from heart disease about threefold compared to those who never touch the stuff, scientists have reported. Smaller quantities confer less protection, but are still better than none, according to the study, which appears in the September issue of the Journal of Internal Medicine.


Yes!!!! We have been waiting for this!! Now, I don't think this is a license to eat King Size Reese's Cups, but some chocolate is better than no chocolate. God is good!

And while we're talking about dead things, let's turn to my love life. Here are the numbers since the whole "options" episode at the end of July:

1385 views of my profile
145 emails (sometimes several from the same guy)
53 winks received, 3 winks I returned
2 guys rejected because they couldn't get it together with the phone call
3 actual dates
0 still in the hunt

Latest date was a great dinner - awesome food - but the poor guy! I'm not kidding you - he talked at great length about binary code and the Linux operating system. For God's sake!! By the time a computer geek reaches middle age, does he not realize that this is not going to get the girl? After that he moved into his health issues, giving some pretty gory surgery details. Um - at dinner? First date? WHY????? I tried to save it - I tried to make some jokes. These guys just don't get me. They don't even smile. It's like going out with Mr. Spock.

At the end he told me he had a great time, I was a great conversationalist. (I now know the secret to being a great conversationalist - say nothing and nod a lot. Smile. Jab yourself in the leg with your fork so you stay awake.) I think I reminded him of a computer monitor.

Match gave me three months free because I was having so much trouble getting them to renew my membership this time. (Or perhaps just out of sheer pity.) I'm going to use the three months and then join a convent. Of course, it will be a Church of Chocolate convent where I can dedicate myself to my higher power.

And where I can perfect my new greeting - Eat chocolate and live long and prosper.

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